Old Men Online
Username:
Password:
Save Password


Register
Forgot Password?

 | Active Topics | Active Polls | Resources | Members | Online Users | Live Chat | Avatar Legend | Search | Statistics | 
[ Active Members: 0 | Anonymous Members: 0 | Guests: 14 ]  [ Total: 14 ]  [ Newest Member: Ancient ]
 All Forums
 Public
 Jokes
 a pungent thread
 New Topic |   Reply to Topic |   Printer Friendly
Author Previous Topic: New highspeed bus! Topic Next Topic: Redneck Vacation  

Specimen-OMO
OMO stalker

Posted - Sep 23 2010 :  10:57:18  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.











2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .











3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.











4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.











5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.











6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.











7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.











8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.











9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.











10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.













11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.













12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'













13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.













14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said: 'Keep off the Grass.'













15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.













16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.













17. A backward poet writes inverse.













18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.













19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.













20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine.











21. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir,

only one carrion allowed per passenger.'













22. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says 'Dam!'













23. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once

again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.













24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies,

'Yes, I'm positive.'













25. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.













26. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them

laugh.





No pun in ten did.

Country: Canada | Posts: 2859

Petrified-OMO
Taxing Patience



Posted - Sep 23 2010 :  12:23:59  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
heh, good ones.


Country: USA | Posts: 7782 Go to Top of Page

Expired-OMO
OMO groupie



Posted - Sep 24 2010 :  07:38:11  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
LOL.....Nice Ones.

However next time could you leave less space between jokes.




By the time I scrolled down to the next one I for got the laat one.


Always take your Med's

Country: USA | Posts: 1063 Go to Top of Page

Rigormortis-OMO
I may be Stiff but that doesn't mean I'm Dead.



Posted - Sep 24 2010 :  17:25:27  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Good chuckles Specimen, thanks.

"When In Doubt, Empty The Magazine"

Country: USA | Posts: 911 Go to Top of Page
  Previous Topic: New highspeed bus! Topic Next Topic: Redneck Vacation  
 New Topic |   Reply to Topic |   Printer Friendly
Jump To:
Old Men Online © 2002 Old Men Online Go To Top Of Page
This page took 0.92 seconds to load Powered By: Snitz Forums 2000